The Newsletter That Makes Neuros Laugh
“Our side effects include belly laughs and the occasional raised eyebrow.”
Table of Contents
Editor’s Note: “When History Meets Hilarity”
Short Feature: Barnum P. Smith’s Great Flight Fiasco
OR Murmurs: What Surgeons Whisper Under Their Breath
Dressing Room Discoveries: Seriously Real Oddities Found in Patient Cubbies
DIY Remedy Fails: Reader Submissions That Shouldn’t Have Worked
Medical Mythology: Folklore Remedies We’d Actually Try
Closing Laugh: “Prescription: One Extra Dose of Ridiculousness”
If You Take Any Of This Seriously You Need A Doctor
1. Editor’s Note: When History Meets Hilarity
Hey Rare Crew,
This issue we’re mixing a dash of 19th-century absurdity with the everyday oddities of modern care. Sure, science gets serious—but we believe there’s always room for a little slapstick. So buckle up for surgeons’ secret stage whispers, cubbyhole curiosities, and a legendary barn-yard flight attempt you won’t forget. Flap along with us - whether it’s your arms or your gums, you are invited.
2. Short Feature: Barnum P. Smith’s Great Flight Fiasco
In 1878, tinkering enthusiast Barnum P. Smith had a brilliant theory: if birds could fly with perfectly healthy nerves, maybe flapping could cure his mysterious limb weakness. Armed with nothing but boundless optimism and questionable physics knowledge, Barnum constructed makeshift wings from chicken feathers and pure determination.
His grand experiment took place behind his barn, where he spent three weeks perfecting what he called "therapeutic aviation therapy." Neighbors reported seeing a grown man leaping off hay bales while frantically flapping homemade wings and shouting medical terminology he'd clearly invented on the spot.
When his flying ambitions crashed harder than his landing technique, Barnum pivoted to naming his condition. After careful consideration (and probable head trauma), he coined "Can't Imagine Doing Push-ups" syndrome—or CIDP for short. He was convinced this snappy acronym would bring him worldwide medical fame.
Sadly, the only thing that took off was his barn—which mysteriously caught fire during his final "flight test." Some say it was an accident. Others whisper that the chickens finally had enough of his feather-stealing antics.
Barnum's legacy? Proof that good intentions, bad science, and livestock don't mix. But hey, at least he stuck the landing..sorta. He left us with a cautionary tale that “altitude won’t cure neuropathy” (or neupidity).
3. Operating Room Murmurs: What Surgeons Whisper Under Their Breath
“Wait—did they say they’re allergic to all anesthetics? Great.”
“Scalpel... left, not right. Oops.”
“They claim they never sleep. But boy, do they snore.”
“If I hear one more ‘Are we done yet?’ I’m using the bone saw.”
“My first patient out of medical school and I forgot my cheat sheet”.
4. Dressing Room Discoveries: Seriously Real Oddities Found in Patient Cubbies
A very angry stuffed dog (needed a bed pan after that surprise).
A single, solitary sock size 16 — wow.
An emergency cookie stash labeled “Do Not Share.”
Mystery pills labeled “For that thing that happens sometimes.”
Half of a tuna sandwich under the seat cushion.
5. DIY Remedy Fails: Reader Submissions That Shouldn’t Have Worked
“Marigold paste cured my rash—until I turned orange.”
“My dad taped a heating pad to my head for my migraine. Now I’m an omelette—and he’s calling me ‘Egg-sasperated.’”
“I gargled pickle juice for sore throat. Now I just crave burgers.”
“Did a vinegar foot soak for detox. Now my toes are so vinegary, my cat thinks I’m salad.”
6. Medical Mythology: Folklore Remedies We’d Actually Try
Wearing socks soaked in chamomile tea—feet say “ahh.”
Chanting “Oomph, oomph” to realign nerve signals.
Balancing an apple on your head to improve posture (and snack moments).
7. Closing Laugh: Prescription: One Extra Dose of Ridiculousness
Thanks for flying with us through the barn-yard fiascos and dressing room oddities. Remember: when life gets too clinical, a little humor is the best referral you can give yourself.
Stay Rare, Stay Seriously Silly!
If you take any of this seriously you need a doctor!
Disclaimer:
No chickens, old men, or newsletters were harmed in the making of this issue. Your diagnosis is real—flight attempts as a cure are not* (*unless prescribed by your insurance’s sense of humor).
Kit Whimsley & The Rarely Serious Team
www.rarelyserious.com
Does He Look Stuffed?